A few nights ago at dinner, Mike, Mom, and I came up with a plan.

Let’s invite the whole family for Thanksgiving!

Have we gone crazy, you ask?

Maybe.

But the past week has reminded me, in a way I would never have chosen, how important it is to have our people around us.

Mom was a little apprehensive at first. Understandably. We don’t know how Mike will feel by Thanksgiving, and she was concerned about how much company might take out of him.

I’m currently watching him take the herbie curbie to the curb, so clearly he’s already starting to reclaim some of his household responsibilities. He’s also bored…and if any of y’all have ever seen Mike bored, you know that he does not idle well. Seeing him doing ordinary things again makes me hopeful about where we’ll be six weeks from now.

By the way, for those of you who don’t know what a herbie curbie is…it’s Southern for the big rolling trash can.

But I digress.

As we kept talking about hosting Thanksgiving, something happened.

Mike perked up. I perked up. We started getting excited.

Mom said seeing how much the idea lifted both of us told her it was the right move.

So the invitation went out. From all three of us.

We’re spread all over the country. We have our own lives, our own schedules, and our own very strong opinions.

We may be loud. We may disagree. We may be a lot.

But we always have fun. We always laugh.

And right now, having our family here sounds pretty dang wonderful.

When people started making plans to come, I cried. Knowing they want to get on a plane and spend Thanksgiving with us means more than I can say.

And you know I generally have plenty of words.

I don’t know how many holidays we’ll have with Mike. I hate even typing that sentence. But none of us knows how many holidays we have with anyone, do we?

I want to make them count.

So my reaction to the week from hell is that I desperately need to be surrounded by family. People who love us unconditionally. People who accept us the way we are. People that have known me all my life, and who have known Mike for nearly half of his. People that know how the hell to HAVE A DAMN GOOD TIME!!!!!!!!!

As for Mike, we’re still working through some challenges.

He feels better in the mornings. As the day goes on, he gets increasingly tired, and he gets overstimulated pretty easily. Things that used to take no effort can take a lot out of him right now.

He’s also still having some trouble with comprehension and mixing up opposites. Coming and going. His and hers. Yours and mine.

You can imagine how confusing a perfectly ordinary conversation can become when the words are familiar but the meaning gets turned around.

We’re working through it. Sometimes that means repeating something or slowing down. Sometimes it means taking a break.

But this is all getting better day by day, for which I’m relieved. Every day he has a little more stamina. Every day he can do a little more, like rolling the herbie curbie to the road. Every day he still wakes up in a good mood, ready to conquer the world. He is determined that he’s going to fight this and get better.

That determination is very much still Mike.

I’m hopeful, too. I want things to get easier for him. I want him to be able to enjoy his day without getting so worn out. And I want to give him room to rest when he needs it.

And when Thanksgiving gets here, we’ll take it as it comes.

We’ll make room for both.

Time together and quiet breaks. Visiting and resting. Mike enjoying everyone when he feels up to it, and stepping away when he’s had enough.

He doesn’t need to entertain anyone. He doesn’t need to power through being tired for anybody else’s benefit.

I just want him to get to enjoy having our people here.

And I want to enjoy it, too.

I’m not aiming for a magazine-worthy Thanksgiving. If the food is ready at different times, something isn’t fully homemade, or we’re eating off paper plates, I think we’ll survive.

I’m aiming for laughter from the next room. Familiar voices. Hugs. People asking for seconds and telling stories we’ve all heard before.

The kind of ordinary family chaos you don’t always realize you miss until everyone goes home.

The past week has been hard. Really hard.

Having something to look forward to feels good.

So yes, we invited the whole family for Thanksgiving.

Yes, we may have lost our minds.

But we’re already happier just thinking about it.

And I’m so damn grateful they want to come.